Tuesday, 6 September 2016

Jokes ....... Condolence in future will be like this

Condolence in future will be like this

Jaane wala bahut hi accha insaan tha,

Hamesha online rehta tha,

Har ek ki Request accept kar leta tha,

Kabhi apne comments se kisi ko takleef nahi di,

Iss ki posts badi jandaar hoti thee,

Bade dil ka malik tha, Kabhi kisi ko block nahi kiya,

Dosto ki selfie dil khol kar like karta tha,

Ameero se share aur ghareebo ko tag kiya karta tha,

Jab maut aayi tab bhi Facebook per hi baitha hua tha.

Bohat hi accha aadmi tha

Jokes .................. Cooking Tips for Ladies

 Rustomji and Sohrabji,
2 Parsi friends, very old and frail, used to meet in the park every day to feed the birds, watch the squirrels and discuss world problems.
Rustomji disappeared for a month. 
One day, Sohrabji approached the park and lo and behold there sat Rustomji !
Sohrabji was very excited and happy to see him and told him so.
Crying out loud, he asked Rustomji "what in the world happened to you ?"
Rustomji replied, "I was in jail."
"Jail?" cried Sohrabji, "What ? !!Whatever  for ?" !!
"Well," Rustomji said, "You know Freny, that cute sexy little blonde waitress at the coffee shop where I sometimes go ?"
"Yeah," said Sohrabji, "I remember her. What about her?"
"Well, one day she filed rape charges against me, and, at 89 years old, I was so proud that when I got into court, I pleaded
'' Guilty "
" The damn judge gave me thirty days for
'' Lying Under Oath......!!!!!! ''
 ससुर का फ़ोन: दामाद जी, कल तुम्हारे साले के लिये लड़की देखने जाना है , हो सके तो आ जाओ
दामाद: आप लोग देखलो, मेरा तो खुदका डिसीजन गलत हुआ पड़ा है .

*Cooking Tips for Ladies*
1) .....While seasoning, if you put few drops of whisky, the oil doesn't burn..
2) .....While kneading dough, put a few drops of beer and the chapatis will be golden brown..
3 .....If you add a few drops of vodka in paneer, it will not spoil in summer time..
4) .....Putting red wine in dal will enhance the taste..
If you can't manage the above,
*5) .....Pour 4 pegs in your husband's mouth, then it doesn't matter how you cook....*