Funny Notices in English collected by an English tourist in Gujarat, India:
It Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read this notice.
In a Baroda hotel elevator:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Surat hotel lobby:
Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Jamnagar:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily..
In a Ahmedabad hotel near Gujarat College:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
Edwards Laundry on Relief Road, Ahmedabad:
Drop your trousers here for best results.
In a Bhavnagar hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is rekvested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
In an Anand laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time..
In a heritage hotel at Junagadh:
Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages.
Advertisement for donkey rides (on the famous white asses) in Rann of Kutch:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?
In a 5-Star Hotel cocktail lounge in Ahmedabad:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
In the office of a Ahmedabad gynecologist:
Specialist in women and other diseases.
In a Bharuch hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.....