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Friday, 7 February 2014

Humor...............Classic Definitions - CRISP AND CLEAR




CLASSIC DEFT DEFINITIONS - CRISP AND CLEAR



Ant
A busy insect that still finds time to go to picnics.



Adder
Mathematically inclined snake.



Atheism
Non-prophet organization.



Babies
Nature's way of showing people what the world looks like at 2 a.m.



Baby sitter
A teenager who must behave like an adult so that the adults who are out can behave like teenagers.



Buffet
A French word which means "Get up and get it yourself."



Charisma
That mysterious something that bald, dull billionaires have.



Comic books
The opera of the print media.



Drama
What literature does at night.



Ecstasy
Discovering a second layer of chocolates under the first.



Ego trip
Something that never gets you anywhere.



Emergency numbers
Police station, fire department, and places that deliver.



Eternity
The first 60 seconds of a blind date.



Etiquette
Learning to yawn with your mouth closed.



Fancy Restaurant
One that serves cold soup on purpose.



Fear
Excitement in need of an attitude adjustment.



Great economist
Someone who, tomorrow, is perfectly capable of explaining why what he forecasted yesterday didn't happen today.



Kissing
A means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other.



Marriage
A friendship recognized by the police.



Mobile phones
The only subject on which men boast about who's got the smallest.



Net worth
Fisherman's income.



Perfectionist
A person who takes great pains and gives them to others.



Pessimist
Someone who complains of the noise when opportunity knocks.



Poise
The ability to continue speaking fluently while the other fellow is picking up the cheque.



Quartet
Where all four think the other three can't sing.



Real Patriot
The fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works.



Semiconductors
Part-time band leaders.



Slimming
Living beyond your seams.



Summer vacation
When parents suddenly realize that teachers are grossly underpaid.



Superstition
Dark side of wonder.



Tattoo
Permanent proof of temporary insanity.



Walking
A form of exercise that loses some appeal when it's done behind a lawn mower.



Workaholic
Someone whose favorite entertainment is Monday morning.

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