Wednesday, 27 November 2013

Jokes......................Maha Faadu jokes.................117213





Teacher Ne Class Mein Bachho Ki Knowledge Check Karne Ke Liye Ek Sawal Puchha

Teacher: Wo Koun Sa Department Hai? Jis Mein Ladkiya Kaam Nahi Kar Sakti?

Pappu Ne Haath Khada Kiya Aur Muskurate Hue Jawab Diya

Pappu: Fire Brigade, Kyunki Ladkiyo Ka Kaam Aag BujhanaNahi Aag Lagana Hai.

SANTA BANTA

Kaun Kitna Kanjoos Hai Iss Baat Ko

Lekar Santa Aur Banta Ke Beech Behas

Ho Rahi Thi.

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Banta: “ Main Itna Kanjoos Hoon Ke

Apne Honeymoon ParAkela Hi Chala

Gaya Aur Apne Paise Bachaye.. :D

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Santa: “ Arrey Ye Bhi Koi Kanjoosi Hui,

Meri Sun, Maine Apni Biwi Ko Apne

Dost Ke Sath Bejh Diya Aur Poore Paise

Bachaye...


CLASS ROOM

Class Room Is Like A Train
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1st Two Benches R
ReservedFor VIP .
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Next Two Benches R General
Coach
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Then
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Last Two Benches R Very
Demanded.
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Bcz Its."SLEEPER COACH":P


PAPPU & WIFE

Padosi to PAPPU -
Tere ghar se hamesha
hasne ki awaz aati hai?
Khushi ka raaz?

PAPPU :- Meri Biwi mujhe joote marti
hai,

Lag jaye to wo hasti hai

Na lage to main hasta hoon.


BAAP BETI

Kanjoos baap k bete ne kha:

"Papa meri GF pregnant ho gayi h.
50,000 mang rhi h,
CHUP rehne ke"

Kanjoos ne khamoshi se paise de
diye.

2 mahine baad dusra beta bola:

"Meri GF pregnant h 75,000 mang
rhi h.

Kanjoos ne khamoshi se de diye.

6 mahine baad

Kanjoos ki kuwari beti boli:
"Daddy, I am pregnant!"

Kanjoos ne usko gale se Lagaya

Aur beti ka maatha chum ke kaha:

"Shabaash beti,

Ab paise lene ki baari hamari hai":-P


MAHA FAADU !!!

Sir : Samajh tujhe 10 laddu diye..

Student : Mujhe..???!!!

Sir : Samajh na tere baap ka kya jata hai..
.Usme
se 5 laddu maine le liye to tere pass kitne
bache..??

Student : 20

Sir : Kaise..?

Student : Samajh na tere baap ka kya jaata
hai...!!!


JOKE 4 GIRLS



Teacher:- Sharab or Pyaar me kya
rishta hai....?? .

Student:- Sharab over hone se
Ladka ulti karta hai.
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Lekin
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Pyaar over hone se Ladki ulti
karti
hai.


"GF" :D

Bhai ko bhai se juda karti hai "GF"

Maa ko bete se juda karti hai "GF"

Pati aur patni me doorie lati hai
"GF"

Gharo me jhagda karati hai "GF"

Insano ko insano se juda karti hai
"GF"

"GF" Matlab "Galat Fahmi"....

Jo abhi ap ko huie hai.

Girl Friend to Bechari Masoom aur
pyari Hoti Hai.


GIFT OF GRLS & BOYS

Ladkiyan ek dusre ko

gift deti hai
perfume
earring
suits
flowers
chocolates
or ladke..??
.
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.Ye le LADKI ka number..
Bas mera naam nahi aana chahiye.. :D :P


BOY DAD SPCL

Ek ladka fail hua to uske papa
ne kaha-
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..
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.

dekh-dekh us ladki ko dekh wo
tumhare sath padhti hai,
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1st aayi hai.
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Boy- dekh-dekh kya dekh
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Usiko dekh-dekh ke to fail hua
hoon.:-D


PASSING MARKS

Dollars has increased to Rs. 62...
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Milk has increased to Rs. 50...
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Petrol has increased to Rs. 80... :'(
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Thanks God!
Passing Marks are still 33..


SHAYARI

GIRLS :- Mohabbat to kisi ek se karungi.
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Ho sake, to kisi nek se karungi.
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Lekin jab tak na milega, wo nek
ladka..
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...
"TRY"to har ek ko karungi..:
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Wah wah . . . . . Ab ise suno . . . .
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Boys :- Arz kiya hai
koi ladki hame thukra de to Gum
nhi,
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Koi Ladki hume thukra de to gum
nhi,
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Are uss ladki ki maa ki.
kismat footi jiske damad hum
nahi.... :D



NON - VEG

Agar trains k Naam indian actress ke
Naam pe hoti toh khabrein aisi hoti:::->

Aaj Bipasha ovrload ho kr gayi hai.

Tabbu k neeche aake ek aadmi
khatam.

Accident mein mallika ki pichli
bogey tabaah ho gayi hai.

Tez raftaar ki wajah se kangana
patri se utar gayi hai.

Rakhi pe chadhne walo ki tadaad
mein ijaafa.

Rani chalte chalte bandh ho gayi.

Vidya ki body change karne ka
faisla.



KATRINA PAR GAIR KANUNI
DHANG SE CHADHE HUE 7 ADMI "GIRAFTAAR :D



FOJI KA KHAT

1 foji ne apni sundr bv ko khat
likha-
JANU is br slry ni mili isliy 100 kiss
bhej rha hu,
kuch dino bd bv ka khat aya
Apne jo 100 kiss bheji uska hisab..
7 kiss sbji wale ko di,
7 kiss se dudh wala nai mana 9
kiss deni pdi,
10-15 kiss bcho ki fees m chli gai,
Mkan malik roj 4-5 kiss le jata h,
ap chinta mt krna av 25-30 kiss
bchi h mhine ka kharcha chal jayega ap apna khayal rakhna:p:p




LADIES DIBBA

Train Chali, Pappu 1 dibbe mechad
gaya.. T.T bola - Kyu jee, Nazar nahi aata,
Ye ladies ka Dibba hai..
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Pappu:- Sorry,
Mere ko laga aap MARD ho.



MATHS TEACHER

Ek student roz roz Maths k teacher ko phone lgata . .
Teacher's wife : kitni baar bataya k woh mar
chuke hai.

Fir baar baar phone kyu krte ho....??
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Student : sun ke acha lagta hai..:P



RAVAN KON

Raavan ki 20 aankhen thi lekin
nazar sirf 1 aurat pe,

Aur aap ki sirf 2 aankhen hai lekin
nazar har aurat pe,

Toh batao asli Raavan kaun hai ???



NEPALI

Nepali ko Jadui chirag mila. Jin nikla bola: 3 wish mango!

Nepali:

1.Ek Bara bangla

2.Ush men khub daulatmnd aadmi

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3.Ushka Chokidar humko bana do. :)



GABBAR SPCL

Gabar:- Kitne Admi the?
Samba:-Sarkar 2
Gabar:- Mujhe ginti nahi ati, 2 kitne hote he? Samba:- 2 1 ke Baad ata he.
Gabar:- aur 2 kpehle?? Samba:- 2 k pehle 1ata hai.
Gabar:- To bich me kaun ata hai?
Samba:- Bich me koi nahi ata.
Gabar:-To fir Dono ek sath Q nahi ate?
Samba:- 2 1 k bad hi aa sakta hai kyun ki 2 1 se bada hai.
Gabar:- 2 1 se Kitna bada hai?
Samba:- Ulluk patthey, Kaminey goli marni hai to maar de, Maine 13 namak khaya hai, chvanprash nahi



LOVE MARRIAGE

Beta: mummy kya love marriage karne se ghar wale
naaraz hote hain kya......??
.
Maa: Tu yakenan kisi chudail ke chakkar main hoga
or ye sab tujhe usi daayan ne kaha hoga,
Ladkiyan to bas ladkon ko phansaane me he lagi
rehti hain
Jahan Acha Ladka dekha shuru
ho gai, Beta in se bach ke rehna ye bahot makkar or
KAMEENI hoti hain or inka to khandan bhi
.
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Beta: aisa kuch nahi hai, Wo to Daddy bata rahe the
ke Aap Dono ne Love Marriage ki thi.. :D



HSBND WIFE

Hsbnd:jb mai tme marta hu tb tm apna
gussa kispe nikalti ho?
Wife:toilet saf krke
Hsbnd:wo kese?
Wife:toilet apke toothbrush se saf krti
hu.


FAADU !!!

Joke Of The Day Read Must :-D
Ek time meri girlFrnd ne mujhe apne ghar bulaya,
Mai ghar pahucha aur bell bajai,
Uski choti sister ne darwaza khola,
Wo bahut sundar thi,
Muskura k boli aap bahut smart ho,
Abhi ghar par koi nahi hai.
Mai akeli hu, Mai muskraya aur,
Apni bike ki taraf wapas jane laga,
To uski puri family ghar se bahar aa gayi aur,
Meri sharafat ki tareef karte huey,
Mujhe gale lagaya aur kaha,
Hum ko rishta manzur hai.
.
Ab mai kya batau...??
Ki Mai to bike ko lock karne gaya tha...



STUDNTS SPCL

Announcement In University:

"The Students Who Have Parked Their Cars On The Driveway, Please Move Them"

Anothr Anouncement After 20 Minutes:

"The 200 Students Who Went To Move 9 Cars Please Return To Their Respective Classes"



JOKE OF THE DAY

Samunder me pani, pani me fish.


wah! wah!


Samunder me pani, pani me fish.


wah! wah!


Aap ko salam aur aap ki Girlfriend ko kiss…


Ab bol wah wah 
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Dirty jokes...... 

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