Saturday, 4 May 2013

Jokes........Killer shayaris are back..........Mehbooba ke pyaar mein mar gaya peter............48613

An electrical engineer, mechanical engineer and software engineer are on their way to a trade show when their car stalls and they are forced to pull over to the side of the road. The mechnical engineer says, "it's probably a mechanical problem. I'll get my tool box out of the trunk and I can fix it." The electrical engineer says, "no, I'll bet it's an electrical problem. I have my multimeter with me and I'll go check it out." Finally, the software engineer says, "I have the solution! Let's all get out of the car and then get back in. I'll bet we'll be back on the road in no time."
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A very very TRIPLE meaning Example of
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" HAR 1 FRIEND KAMINA HOTA HAI "

Ladka dost se :
yaar maine apni Girl Friend ko uski birthday pe apni behan ki new diamond ring chori ker k gift de di,

Dost (Thappad maar kar) :
kaminey Itni mehngi kharidi thi maine..

Ladka: saale marta kyun hai tere ghar hi to wapis gayi hai
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Tring Tring Tring.

Hello kon bol raha hai..?
Other side: Ji, main bol raha hu.
Rajesh Ray: oye ye to kamal ho gaya..!!
idhar se bhi main hi bol raha hu.,.!! :D :p
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Teacher : What does your father do ?
Student -
He distributes everyone happiness and sorrows .

Teacher : What do you mean ?

Student : He is a postman.
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Teri khamoshi aur
udasi ki wajah hum samajh na sake ae dost,

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Wo to shaam ko teri mummy ne bataya
ke aaj teri chappal se pitai hui hai! :p :D
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Ek Jungle me sab janwar gaa rahe the "PAN PARAG PAN MASALA PAN PARAG"

Par JIRAF Nahi gaa raha tha
Batao kyun ?

Q ki Unche log unchi pasnd "MANIKCHAND"
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Mele mai Announcement hua-
"Ek Bachha mila Hai, Jinn ka hai, Aaa Karr le Jayen!"
Santa Bheed Se Chillaata hua Aaya aur bola- Mujhe bhi dikhaao ye Jinn ka Bachha Kaisa hota hai?!
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पापा- एक ज़माना था कि मैं 10 रुपए में किराना सामान, सब्जी, दूध और नाश्ता लेकर आता था।
बेटा- अब पॉसिबल नहीं पापा, क्योंकि अब दुकानों में सीसीटीवी कैमरे लगे होते हैं।
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Wife- I am too fed up of your daily fights and I just wanna divorce ..

Hb- Ok but first take dis chocolate ..

Wf emotionaly- so u don't want me to go, manaa rahe ho mujhe chocolate deke.

Hb- Nahi, maa kehti hai, kuch shubh kaam karne se pehle, kuch meetha khana chahiye.. Kaam achchha hota hai.

For the first time ...Husband Rocked, Wife Shocked !!
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Ek aurat apni friends se: Tujhe tera pati kaise thhode din baad itne paise de deta hai? ..................................
She replies: Main us se kehti hoon ke mayke jaa rahi hoon. 10000 rupaye de do. Wo khushi se de deta hai.
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A Boy Doing Push Ups

'One Two Three'
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Suddenly A Girl Passes

Boy - "82 83 84" 
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Killer shayaris are back
Using ur brain is strictly, V.Strictly prohibited.............

1.) Mehbooba ke pyaar mein mar gaya peter,
Hero Honda Splendor 80km/Litre

2.) IPL ke matches dekh ke logon ko maza aaraha hain,
12 saal se CID ka Daya ek hi Qualis Chala raha hain

4.) Na jaan na pehchaan, tu mera mehmaan,
And the award goes to A.R.Rehman.

5.) Manchester United mein khelta hain ROONEY
ACP Pradhuymann ne kaha " aakhir chahta kya hain khooni"

6.) Kisiko na thi, mere pyaar ki khabar,
Kisiko na thi, mere pyaar ki khabar,
Diagram galat ho gaya, rubber de rubber

7.) Teri adao pe main waari waari..
Dial 139 for railway enquiry.

8.) Na jine ki aarzu na marne ka khauf..
The number your trying is currently switched off.

9.) Apne gamo ko bas dil me daba lo.
Naya godrej powder hair dye,Bas kaato gholo aur laga lo.

12.) yuh khamosh rehkar tadpogi kabtak....
Cameraman praful ke saath deepak chaurasia AAJ TAK..

14.) mehgai ki iss daur mein karna padta hai apne kharche par kabooo..
mehgai ki iss daur mein karna padta hai apne kharche par kabooo..
ek chutki sindoor ki kimat tum kya jano Ramesh babu...

15.) mein hoon yahan tu hai wahan...
mein hoon yahan tu hai wahan..
LIFEBUOY hai jahan tandurusti hai wahan...

16.) Blood donate karne se pehle hamesha uska group janchna...
Blood donate karne se pehle hamesha uska group janchna...
BASANTI in kuton ke samne mat nachna....

19.) Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala ...
Yashomati Maiyya Se Bole Nandlala ...
Maa, Tata Sky Laga Daala To Life Jhingalala ..!!

20.) Romio ne juliet se kaha ek sach..
Romio ne juliet se kaha ek sach..
Asali masale sach sach
MDH.....MDH ...!

21.) 1 ladki ne kiya ladke ko gaal pe kiss
1 ladki ne kiya ladke ko gaal pe kiss
Mutual funds are subjected to market risks

22.) Aatma Chhod Gayii Shareer Puraana ...
Aatma Chhod Gayii Shareer Puraana ..
Didi Tera Devar Deewana ..

23.) Naach bulbul naach, tujhe paisa milega
hum CID se hai,koi apne jagah se nahi hilega..
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