Monday, 18 March 2013

Pappu pass ho gaya-- Pappu jokes.....31113

Gift to mama

Four brothers left home for college, and they became successful doctors and lawyers and prospered.

Some years later, they chatted after having dinner together. They discussed the gifts they were able to give their elderly mother who lived far away in another city.

The first said, “I had a big house built for Mama".

The second said, ” I had a hundred thousand dollar theater built in the house".

The third said, “I had my Mercedes dealer deliver an SL600 to her".

The fourth said, “You know how Mama loved reading the Bible and you know she can’t read anymore because she can’t see very well. I met this preacher who told me about a parrot that can recite the entire Bible. It took twenty preachers 12 years to teach him. I had to pledge to contribute $100,000 a year for twenty years to the church, but it was worth it. Mamma just has to name the chapter and verse and the parrot will recite it".

The other brothers were impressed.


After the holidays Mom sent out her "Thank You" notes.

She wrote: “Milton, the house you built is so huge I live in only one room, but I have to clean the whole house. Thanks anyway".

“Marvin, I am too old to travel. I stay home, I have my groceries delivered, so I never use the Mercedes. The thought was good. Thanks".

“Michael, you gave me an expensive theater with Dolby sound, it could hold 50 people, but all of my friends are dead, I’ve lost my hearing and I’m nearly blind. I’ll never use it. Thank you for the gesture just the same".

"Dearest Melvin, you were the only son to have the good sense to give a little thought to your gift. The chicken was delicious. Thank you".

Luv You,
Mama
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TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO ! "!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about? PAPPU : Yesterday you said it's H to O !

************ *****
TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America. PAPPU : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America? CLASS : PAPPU!

************ *****

TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"? PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

************ *****

TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I". PAPPU : I is...
TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am." PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

************ *****

TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of " COINCIDENCE?"
PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

************ *****

TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"

************ *****

PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt? FATHER : No. Why do you ask that? PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

************ *****
TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !
PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.

************ *****
TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to , my mom is a good cook.

************ *****

TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as yourbrother' s. Did you copy his ?
PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !

************ ****
TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
PAPPU: A teacher 
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A US Air Force C-141 is scheduled to leave Thule Air Base, Greenland at midnight. During the pilot's pre-flight check, he discovers that the latrine holding tank is still full from the last flight.

So a message is sent to the base and an airman who was off duty is called out to take care of it.
This guy finds that the latrine pump truck has been left outdoors and is frozen solid, so he must find another one in the hangar, which takes even more time. He returns to the aircraft and is less than enthusiastic about what he has to do.
Nevertheless, he goes about the pumping job deliberately and carefully (and slowly) so as not to risk criticism later.

As he's leaving the plane, the pilot stops him and says, "Son, your attitude and performance has caused this flight to be late and I'm going to personally see to it that you are not just reprimanded but punished".
Shivering in the cold, his task finished, he takes a deep breath,
stands up tall and says, "Sir, with all due respect, I'm not your son; I'm an Airman in the United States Air Force. I've been in Thule, Greenland, for 11 months without any leave, and reindeers' asses are beginning to look pretty good to me. I have one stripe; it's two-thirty in the morning, the temperature is 40 degrees below zero, and my job here is to pump shit out of an aircraft.
Now, just exactly what form of punishment did you have in mind?"
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