Smile Please !! Here I am with my Hindi Jokes and Chutkule. हिंदी चुटकुले और कार्टून्स
Wednesday, 30 January 2013
One mind blowing interview ----------------12213
One mind blowing interview ------------------------------- ------------- Interviewer: Tell me about yourself. Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from Baban Rao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.
Interviewer: Baban Rao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!
Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an
admission into it. What happened is – due to cricket world cup I scored
badly in 12th. I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my
father said (I prefer to call him ‘baap’) – “I can’t invest so much of
money”. No baap actually said – “I will never waste so much of money on
you”. So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name – Baban
Rao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari
Interviewer: Ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering.
Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years. But you
know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis
tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd
year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years.
Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6!
Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try
to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches
really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it.
Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned. Candidate: No no, I am talking about Exams!!
Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?
Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I
would complete it. In fact, when I flunked in 3rd year, she was looking
for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra) through some
Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher studies? Candidate: He he he, are you kidding? Completing ‘lower’ education itself was so much of pain!!
Interviewer: Let’s talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked?
Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current
platforms. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then.
As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and
Andheri are the places in Mumbai)
Interviewer: And which languages have you used? Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages.
Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB?
Candidate: It is a common sense – C comes after B. So VC is a higher
version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new
Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language? Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.
Interviewer: What is your general project experience? Candidate: My general experience about projects is – most of the times they are in pipeline!
Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job?
Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata Info Tech ltd. Since
joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that
Bench was another software like Windows.
Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience?
Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn’t be difficult. I know Word and
Excel. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone
calls and use speaker facility. And very important – I know few words
like – ‘Showstoppers ‘ , ‘hot fixes’, ‘SEI-CMM’, ‘quality’, ‘version
control’, ‘deadlines’ , ‘Customer Satisfaction’ etc. Also I can blame
others for my mistakes!
Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company? Candidate: Not much. 1. I should at least get 40,000 in hand.
2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have
deadlines. I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent. 3. I believe in flexi-timings. 4. Dress Code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear t-shirt and jeans. 5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to avoid breakdown due to overwork.
6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably
1-2 months) assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe.
But considering the fact that there are Olympics coming up in China in
the current year, I don’t mind going there in that period. As you can
see I am modest and don’t have many expectations. So can I assume my
Interviewer: Ha ha ha ha ha ha. Thanks for your
interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much
before and that is why I kept on asking you questions. Welcome to
--------------------------------------- The fellow was appointed in a newly created section ‘Stress Management’ in the HRD of Infosys.
Excellence is not the only thing needed. It’s the unique quality of a person which can lead anyone to Success.