Saturday, 12 January 2013

I committed a big mistake by marrying my 'Secretary'...........5113

Aksar Ladkiya Yeh Liney Maarti Hain:
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1. Mera BF baki Ladko jaisa nhi hai, woh
sabse alag hai.!
( Jaise sabhi Ladko ko Try kiya ho)

2. Hamare kitne Bache honge, unke Naam kya honge, tum mujhe Pyaar krte ho na...
baby..btao na baby...hamare kitne Bache honge...baby.!
( Jaan lelo Baby ki, baby zinda rahega tab baby honge naa...! )

3. Uff...Main toh sahi se Tyaar bhi nahi ho paayi, aise hi bhagna pada ghar se.
( Jaise Tyaar hoke Angelina Jolie lagti na )

4. Humein baat krni hai, tumhari samjh mein aya... Humein baat krni hai.
( Kya aapne aisi koi Ladki dekhi hai jise baat krna aata ho )

5. Agar mere paas Jadoo ki chhadi hoti toh Mai apni Almari ko Make up ke Samaan se bhar deti.
(Kuchh achha mat soch leyo, Make up
laga kar Chudeil se Sundar Chudeil bhale hi lage, rahegi toh Chudeil hi )

6. Mujh mein aisa kya hai jo tum mujhe psand krte ho..!
( Jab aaj tak Tujhe nhi pta chala toh mujhe kaise pta chalega )

7. Mere baal bahut lambe the..lekin...Ma ine chhote kara liye !
( Ab yeh b keh dena k Mera Colour bahut Fair tha, lekin Cream laga kar Dark
hogya )

8. Main yeh nhi karti hun....lekin tum mere liye Khaas ho isiliye.....
( Achha toh baaki ke liye kya karti ho )

9. Tum na bahut WOH ho.
( Kya aaj tak koi samjh paya hai
Ladkiyon ke is YEH-WOH ka matlab..;) :P
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A man was watching a movie at home and suddenly shouts nooooooooooooo!!
Don't get off the horse!
Its a trap!!
Wife: what are u watching?
Man: our wedding DVD...
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Santa: I committed a big mistake by marrying my 'Secretary'.
Banta: Marriage anyone is a big mistake, why pin-point just the poor 'Secretary'.
Santa: No it's not that. I thought that she'll still continue to obey my orders!
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Ek_Aurat faSt Chalti train me Chadi to logo ne Kaha: "Kamaal ki Aurat hai..!"
tO Aurat ne Kaha: "Kamaal tO mera devar Hy me tO Jamaal ki Aurat hu
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Heights of coolness.......!!
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Two best friends coming out of the examination hall with chips and coke in hands
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First friend: Which paper was it?
Second friend: I guess it was maths...not sure
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1st: (surprisingly): You read the question paper??
2nd: NO..! I saw a girl sitting besides me using a calculator
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1 Hijade ne galti se Viagra kha li,

Thodi der baad hichki ke saath Goli bahar aa gayi aur uspe likha tha,

"Unsupported file
Hardware not found"
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Girl to her friends - Mujhe tumhari
help chahiye ..
Girl 1 - yaar me toh khud busy
hu..
Girl 2 - Yaar mummy ne jaldi ghar
bulaya hai
Girl 3 - kya tune meri help ki thi?

Boy to his Friends -- yaar ek
panga ho gaya
Boy 1 -- bol kitne bande
bulaun :@
Boy 2 -- Maa bahan ek kar dunga ,
bata kaun hai??
Boy 3 -- kiski itni himmat apne
bhai se panga kare :-x
Hahahah Agree boyz hit
LIKE..!! :D=D
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The maid asked for a raise, and the wife was upset.

She asked, "Now, Helen, why do you think you deserve a pay increase?"

Helen: "There are three reasons. The first is that I iron better than you."

Wife: "Who said that?"

Helen: "Your husband."

Wife: "Oh."

Helen: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."

Wife: "Who said that?"

Helen: "Your husband."

Wife: "Oh."

Helen: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."

Wife: "Did my husband say that as well?"

Helen: "No, the gardener said."

Wife: "So, how much do you want?":)
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My ex texted me , "You can delete my number",
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I texted back "Who is this?" :-D :
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HINDI SONGS & THEIR MEDICAL INTERPRETATIONS

Jiya Jale jaan jale,
Raat bhar dhuan chale
-FEVER

Tadap tadap ke is dil se aah nikalti rahi
-HEART ATTACK

Suhani raat dhal chuki ...naa jaane tum kab aoge
-CONSTIPATION

Bidi jalayle jigar se piya jigar ma badi aag he
-ACIDITY

Tujhme rab dikhta hai ..yaara main kya karoo
-CATARACT

Tuje yaad na meri aayi kisi se ab kya kahna
-ALZHEIMER'S

Mann dole mera tann dole
-VERTIGO

Tip tip barsa paani,
paani ne aag lagayee
-URINARY INFECTION

Dil Dhadak Dhadak ke keh raha he..
-HYPERTENSION

Aaj Kal Paaon Zameen par nahi padte mere..
-CORN ON FEET

Haay re
haay Neend nahin aaye..
-INSOMNIA

Batana bi nahi aata, Chupana bi nahi aata..
-PILES
And Above All

Lagi Aaj Saawan ki phir woh Zadi he..
-LOOSE MOTION
 
 
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