Popads

Sunday, 23 December 2012

OSHO jokes on Chandulal and other jokes.......154712

Osho jokes on Chandulal :

Several young boys were called by the New Delhi authorities for a medical check-up to determine the paternity of a certain teenage girl’s baby. Chandulal went in and after a few minutes came out. “Don’t worry, fellows,” he smiled. “They’ll never find out. They’re taking samples from the finger!”
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..

 Chandulal took his dog to the veterinarian and asked him to cut his tail off completely. “Why in the world would you want me to do that?” asked the vet.
“Well,” Seth Chandulal said, “my mother-in-law is coming to visit us, and I don’t want anything in the house to suggest that she is welcome!”

.
.
.
.
.

.
..

 “Hey, boss, I have been here twenty-five years and I have never asked for a raise before,” said Popatlal to Chandulal.
“That’s why you have been here twenty-five years!” replied Chandulal.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
 
“Chandulal,” said a rich Hindu grocer in Ahmedabad to his assistant, “have you mixed the glucose with the syrup?” “Yes, sir.”
“And sanded the sugar?” “Yes, sir.”
“Dampened the lettuce and mushrooms?” “Yes, sir.”
“And put water in the milk?” “Yes, sir.”
“Then you may come in to prayers.”

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
 





Chandulal: “Good evening, thought I would drop in and see you about the umbrella you borrowed from me last week.”
Gaurilal: “I’m sorry, but I lent it to a friend of mine. Did you want it?”
Chandulal: “Well, not for myself, but the fellow I borrowed it from says the owner wants it.”
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
  A pretty young girl stretched out on the psychiatrist’s couch. “I just can’t help myself, Doctor. No matter how hard I try to resist, I bring five or six men with me into my bedroom every night. Last night there were ten. I just feel so miserable, I don’t know what to do.”
In understanding tones the doctor rumbled, “Yes, I know, I know, my dear.”
“Ah!” the surprised girl exclaimed. “Were you there last night too?”

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..A little girl answered the knock on the door of the farmhouse. The caller, a rather troubled-looking, middle-aged man, asked to see her father.
“If you have come about the bull,” she said, “he is fifty dollars. We have the papers and everything and he is guaranteed.”
“Young lady,” the man said, “I want to see your father.”
“If that is too much,” the little girl replied, “we got another bull for twenty-five dollars, and he is guaranteed too, but he does not have any papers.”
“Young lady,” the man repeated, “I want to see your father!”
“If that is too much,” said the little girl, “we got another bull for only ten dollars, but he is not guaranteed.”
“I am not here for the bull,” said the man angrily. “I want to talk about your brother, Elmer. He has gotten my daughter in trouble!”
“Ah, I am sorry,” said the little girl. “You will have to see Pa about that, because I don’t know what he charges for Elmer.”

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
..

Osho – A huge bully sauntered into the dimly lit saloon. “Is there anybody here called Kilroy?” he snarled. Nobody answered. Again he sneered, “Is there anybody here called Kilroy?”
There was a moment of silence and then a little Irishman stepped forward. “I am Kilroy,” he said. The tough guy picked him up and threw him across the bar. Then he punched him in the jaw, kicked him, slapped him around and walked out. About fifteen minutes later the little fellow came to. “Boy, didn’t I fool him,” he said. “I ain’t Kilroy!”
-->

No comments:

Post a Comment